Breaking point please help :’(

Char96

Regular Member
Registered
I lived in Scotland until recently and avian vet's are practically non- existent, yes Falkirk is the only one, people travel from Sky to see them but it is difficult. I have a grey and he does not like me, prefers my husband but he is rarely here so we have reached, after 4 years and understanding. I chat and spoil him with treats, otherwise he does as he wishes. When in Scotland he had a huge cage in the corner of the room, an indoor aviary really which was 'home made', he had no problem going back in, now he rarely goes in his little cage, only for feeding but I now have a parrot room for him and 3 others.

Why since I moved down to England have many Scottish members joined?
Yeah all the avian vets tend to be down the central belt area it’s a real shame. Our local vet will happily see him Becuase she deals with the local falconry but I’m hoping he never has to go back 😅if anything major was wrong I’d drive him down to Falkirk area. We did have a massive corner cage too but the trouble was I could reach the top and max knew this and would run to the back so I couldn’t get him. He only ever used the top half of the cage too no matter what we put lower down. He was only in that cage for just over a month then we purchased a Santos cage which is perfect sizing for him I think, it’s not too big that space gets un-used but not too small either.Also I can reach the play stand in the top no problem so he can’t be king of the castle and get away from me 😂
 

Roz

Regular Member
Just reading all the lovely responses from everyone.

I’m going to get up 15 mins earlier so he’s out 545-630 and I’ll spend the last 20 minutes with him back in the cage but with door open and see if I can settle him before I go to work.
Do you eat breakfast before you go to work... or even drink a cup of coffee/tea? That's what I used to do with my birds. They had out time as I prepared all our breakfasts. Then they went in to eat. I used to sit next to Kobe the Pionus and eat my breakfast whilst he ate his inside his cage. He loves going into his cage as he knows it's meal time... even though I had to leave for work 20 minutes later, the reason for going into his cage was for his yummy breakfast. With Ollie (Amazon) who wasn't tame, I would also let out of his cage and he would fly in as soon as he saw me slot in the food bowls.

Is he in his cage when you eat your tea with him? If not, maybe it's time to teach him to eat inside his cage. At tea time, that's when you could leave the door open... ie. when you have more time.

I don’t want to push him and force him to interact with me but I don’t want him to learn and think I don’t want to play and interact with him if that makes sense 🤔I do try to wait for him to come to me but that very rarely happens and if he does he’s looking at me hands because he knows I give him cashews when he comes over and I think he just sees me as a food provider and nothing more :( it’s just depressing when I work so so hard with him and soon as he gets the opportunity to be next to my husband he’ll bomb it over even if my husband has gave him zero attention in days. It’s hard to stay positive that things will get better and he will learn and come around but I’m running out of hope at this rate :( it’s hard to make him trust me when I’ve never gave him a reason not to :/
I think since he is so eager to take cashews from you, you should try target training, as Michael suggested, ie. make him work for his cashews. Training like this will open up a whole new way of communicating between you. You don't need a clicker to do it. This is a brilliant video to teach you how, first posted by another member here:


You can even teach and practice this through cage bars which can make being inside the cage a good experience.

It doesn't sound like he doesn't like you since he seems to step up and down, and accompany you around the house with no problem. Will he do this with your husband present? I am wondering if he is getting territorial about the sitting room since that is where he is out so much. Yet, it seems that the flying to attack is over? Be thankful he wants to check out other places away from you rather than attack! :biggrin: Try the target training - it will be fun for both of you!

I’ll try and just let him do his own thing when he’s out the cage, I can’t make him want to spend time with me but hopefully he’ll realise I’m more fun than toys. I’m thinking maybe because he’s young everything’s all fun and exciting and he just wants to play on his own. I was just hoping it was something I could nip in the bud whilst he’s young but seems it’s going to be a long process. Oh well, only way is up right? 🤣
Sounds like a good plan!
 

Char96

Regular Member
Registered
Just reading all the lovely responses from everyone.



Do you eat breakfast before you go to work... or even drink a cup of coffee/tea? That's what I used to do with my birds. They had out time as I prepared all our breakfasts. Then they went in to eat. I used to sit next to Kobe the Pionus and eat my breakfast whilst he ate his inside his cage. He loves going into his cage as he knows it's meal time... even though I had to leave for work 20 minutes later, the reason for going into his cage was for his yummy breakfast. With Ollie (Amazon) who wasn't tame, I would also let out of his cage and he would fly in as soon as he saw me slot in the food bowls.

Is he in his cage when you eat your tea with him? If not, maybe it's time to teach him to eat inside his cage. At tea time, that's when you could leave the door open... ie. when you have more time.



I think since he is so eager to take cashews from you, you should try target training, as Michael suggested, ie. make him work for his cashews. Training like this will open up a whole new way of communicating between you. You don't need a clicker to do it. This is a brilliant video to teach you how, first posted by another member here:


You can even teach and practice this through cage bars which can make being inside the cage a good experience.

It doesn't sound like he doesn't like you since he seems to step up and down, and accompany you around the house with no problem. Will he do this with your husband present? I am wondering if he is getting territorial about the sitting room since that is where he is out so much. Yet, it seems that the flying to attack is over? Be thankful he wants to check out other places away from you rather than attack! :biggrin: Try the target training - it will be fun for both of you!



Sounds like a good plan!
So I bought a target training stick online last night on amazon prime so fingers crossed it arrives today. I’ve been watching loads of videos and if it works I think it’ll be really good and help to train him in future without him getting confused with mixed signals 😅I don’t usually eat breakfast but the drink I have in the morning I drink whilst I’m prepping his food in the kitchen with him. This morning I put in him 5 mins earlier and for some reason (must have been a fluke) he didn’t scream or bite just went straight in. But I sat beside his cage and had a drink and tried to feed him a few dry Cheerios (his absolute fave treat) through the bars to entice him near his food bowl but it didn’t work. He just starts climbing about in a panicky way making the high pitch peep!! Noise there was no calming him or getting him to eat his breakfast. But I’m gonna try do this everyday in hope that he realises we have time to eat together before I go and I’m not just heading out the door straight after I close his door. He’s not any worse around me if my husband is in the room but if given the opportunity he would climb behind my head on the sofa to sit and nibble on his ears and preen his hair. I’ll update when the target stick arrives and see how we get on 🤞🏻I’m feeling pretty confident about it though!
Just read your message again, he does eat his tea in his cage next to me, I have to have the door closes though as he will straight up ignore his food and come out and try steal off my plate. Steak and chips must look more appealing than parrot chop, who would have thought 😂 but he does eat his tea whilst we eat he’s pretty good then will just play in his cage till we’re done
 

Scott199

Regular Member
I can’t help much as I’m new to birds myself but with the help of everyone here and time I learnt a few little things that may help, we have a rescue grey, unknown age but he was very, very nervous of hands and still won’t step up, but below is a few little things that may help.

when I started clicker training I bit every other time I tried, we found out he hated the clicker object or noise, so once removed we just used a excited “good boy” after a few days he seemed to take to this extremely well (all donthrough bars to start)

he used to bite the stick but I left that and was just happy he was learning, then started to move him around the cage, then started to get a little more restrictive, he only gets a treat if he touches the stick.

it’s made him so much better, although I’m still struggling to get him to step up, ( his perch is the devil when in my hand :) ) if I tap his perch in his cage, he generally goes back in with no fuss, even if he‘a across the room, he’ll waddle over and climb back in.

it’s not much but hope it helps a little.

this was how I done it, I was trying to get him used to hands, you would probably be way ahead of this stage.

 

Roz

Regular Member
That was fabulous, @Scott199 Yes, for a bird that is fearful or aggressive it does help to teach behind bars at first because you both know you can't encroach on the other's space, thus resulting in more trust and confidence (for both of you).
 
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